看海，听海

日历一页一页地被我一天一天的撕下

从4月的29号到今早5月的22号

再多7天，就满一个月了

短短的假期就这样给我‘虚度’过了

说实在的，这假期我很懒惰

给自己的task几乎没有一项完成

不知自己的动力往哪跑了

就是提不起劲

反而我在这假期里

从一只小夜猫变成了大夜猫

也几乎快变成宅女了

好怀念过去成天往外跑的感觉

我是个很怕寂寞的人

但是却有个坏毛病--不善于沟通

或许这跟我本身有很大的关系

最近，和一个朋友去了趟槟城

决定不驾车,甚至连目的地也不决定（只决定要去times square的full house吃午餐）

就上路了（很赶时间的 一趟‘背包旅行-槟城半日游）

久违的渡轮和巴士

好熟悉的味道

槟城的巴士快好多，每10分钟就来一趟（省了我不少时间)

过后决定去batu ferringhi

结果竟然沿海走了一个小时，吹了一小时的海风，晒了一小时的大太阳

从hard rock hotel 沿海走到golden sand resort(zone g -zone b)

自己也不敢相信~

沿途中，好像也没什么说话，就拿着一双鞋一直走一直走

只知道，这片海

让我心旷神怡

望着一大片蓝蓝的海

我的心情瞬间开朗了起来

听着一波波地海浪声

 我的心突然平静了下来

好喜欢，那感觉

很可惜，那时正是中午

没什么人在玩水上活动

不知上次去海边是什么时候了

这次的’海边漫步‘，整个人开心了起来

还记得在巴士上看到海的那一刻

心情好兴奋

不知道为什么，就是非常期待

好奇怪的一种感觉

好像没看过海似的

那下次又会是什么时候呢？

insomia~

this few days~

insomia kept follow me

not able to get into sleep even it's 3am!!!

i hate it

but i duno how to do

i drink a warm water before sleep

(should be a warm milk~but i dun really like milk so much)

i really dun like this~

it's makes my eye bag bigger and bigger

it's makes my panda eye moreclearer

it's destroying my healthy

i dun really like this holiday

it should be an enjoyable holiday

but seem like i din't enjoy that much

loneliness is the only feeling i can feel now

in this holiday, i dun really meet with any friends not even one

i used to be a very active person

i love outdoor activities, i love makes friends around

but i dun really have an intimate friends

how to say that?

i used to trust a friend before

she was a best friend ever i met

but through days and days

i found out that i was wrong

we used to be so good is just an illusion

there is so much different between us

one of it she is trully a " Hikikomori“  宅女

but i  like outing........bla bla bla

i cant express out by words(i duno how to express it out)

just feel that we are not the same at all

i cant share my things to her,i felt uncomfortable when i am with her now

for me, she is too selfish.....

maybe i should say she is too直率

she din't care any people opinion(this is the one i opt to learn from her, but  i just so care about it)

she can say out anythings if she dun like it

and she is too subjective

in a way that i just can't bear on this

she thinks that we will follow her opinion(her family member's will tolerate)

but we wont

i just hate to tolerate to her anymore

why  do i must the do thing that she like?

why should i stay at home everyday?

why cant i make my friends?

why should u just like my shadow~please leave me for a second~

i am tired of this life~

this 1 year really changes me

i am now a computer addict

i used to be very talkative but now i talk less

i hate this kind of myself~

midnight drive~~

its 10/5/2012  3.40 am now
half an hour ago
i was awaked by my parents from my sweet dream
nothing big deal but i need to fetch my parent to the travel agent there
they are going to shanghai for trip
left me behind and my sis for 1 weeks =(
i cant go out these few days~
be my sis 'ahmad'
sigh~what a holiday~

well, back to topic~
it was really horrible driving in the midnight
sumore the music from the radio sound more terrible(of course i switch off it after that)~
so totally silent there
there was not much cars on the road
i kept watching the rear view mirror
well, maybe i watch too much movie or think too much
scared of somebody sitting behind!!!
=)

honestly, i am not sure either scare or hate the 'dark'
i never switch off the light in my room
unless there is the some street light reflected into the room or got people accompany with me
else i will never switch off the light till morning
kind of phobia???
even in the midnight ,there is people sleeping beside me~
if i awake and i found there is no light then i will try to look around for the people until i found that she's there then i will continue to sleep

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
result is going to release this friday
i am getting nervous~kept praying for the result~
please pray for me too~

okay, cooled down from the fear
should get into my bed and continue my dream
night~and mornig too

am i fat???

my bedframe broke yesterday midnight!!!

i heard some crack sound 

then i woke up and see what happen~

i couldn't find anything 

so i switch off the light and going to the bed agian 

when i lay down !!

another crack sound~

and i knew that my bed~

!@#$%!@#$%!@#$%

hahahaha~not my fault is it???

 i am sure not me!!!

is the bed fault~~the mattress is too heavy not me!!!

or should say the bedframe is too weak???

sad case

u are still so new~

if not mistaken u are taken home on year 2010

2 years only???

how come???

whatever~good bye!!

thanks for ur serving~~

壮烈牺牲~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

well~till today it's 1 week after my final exam

which mean i am holiday-ing

but what i have done during 1 week times?

i done nothing

everyday i woke up always pps!!!

the vampire diaries 

and

prison break from season 1 till season 3 

now left season 4 and the movie<the final break>

then it's done 

time to continue my painting!!

my mum urge me for the paint

she wants to hang on the new house there

this is the paint which i need to finish it during this sem break!!

there are 4 

but till now i just finished 1 of them only~

haiz~

how long did i need to take for another 3??

and the piano sheet ??

i need more time!!!!

can i got 36 hours in a day??

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i  am still praying for my result

i hope my effort works!!!

really meant it

i put more effort this time 

but i still failed to get my confidence

the last 2 paper was my worst paper

i have nothing to say 

it all my fault i din study well

so now all i can do is just pray for it

i know i cant score higher

but all i want is just let me pass~

i appreciate it!!

thanks ><

bieber edition?????

i found something funny today!!!

let see what is that :

wth????

is this true???

hahahahahahahahahahahaha

我接受唔到咯

@@